Sunday, May 15, 2011

You Know You Live in the Country When...

National Cow Week starts today!

I confess I completely forgot about it until ten or twenty minutes ago. Shame on me. Anyway, since it's late, and I have things to do, I'll just copy the cow story that started it all from my post on Embracing Insanity.

The morning began quiet and peaceful like most mornings, and, like all mornings, I was on the computer catching up on all I missed in my virtual social life during the seven-and-a-half hours I slept. In the corner of my eye I caught a glimpse of movement out the window, and behold, I saw my pony galloping down the pasture. Indeed, all the horses were agitated, snorting and bobbing their heads as they stared intently, ears pricked, at something in the woods.

I mentioned this to my mom, and we went to the window and peered out to see what the horses were looking at. It was a windy morning, and wind tends to induce friskiness in horses, so I wouldn't have thought much of it except that there was apparently a specific object that had excited them.

And then we saw him--a man, clad in overalls, meandering through the woods at the back of our property.

I was a little creeped out. I'm a rather paranoid person, with an extremely morbid imagination, having watched a few episodes too many of First 48 and American Justice and the like, and I was thinking, This guy's a serial killer. He's a serial killer and what we can't see for the darkness of the forest is the body he's dragging and he's going to see us in the window and come into the house and carve out our bowels slowly with a samurai sword and my dad's going to come home from work to find my small intestine strewn across the house like party streamers.

Yeah. Like I said, I have a really morbid imagination. And then the guy started running. And I was thinking, Okay, no body. He dumped it somewhere and he's running from the police...

He turned and ran toward the street, so we hurried to the front windows and waited for him to appear around the corner. Instead, a herd of cattle came trotting down the road. A moment later, the man followed after them, chasing a few stragglers who cantered back to the group.

We were rolling with laughter. This wasn't a murderer, but a farmer collecting his runaway cattle!

There were ten to fifteen of them, and they turned onto a sidestreet and paused in someone's backyard. The farmer caught his breath a minute, then they continued into the neighborhood and out of sight.

You know you live in the country when a herd of cattle stampedes in front of your house.


  1. EP-IC! LOL That was hilarious! Especially the little narration by your morbid imagination... priceless. xD I'll have to do my post for National Cow Week within the next few days, though I doubt it will compare to this. :) I was confused, though, I thought N.C.W. started the 17th... guess I was wrong! LOL

    Also - Embracy Insanity looks awesome, but I don't see a follow button anywhere. HORROR! Do you think you could put up the followers gadget so I can follow and keep up? :)

  2. Hehe, I'm glad you liked it. I can't wait to see your post! Speaking of that... I'm not sure I've followed your blog yet. I need to go do that!

    Oh, I didn't think about that. I think in designing the blog Mercy was copying the original Wordpress one as closely as possible, and that one of course didn't have the Blogger follow thing... hmm. There is an email subscription thing (marked as "Instant Apocalypse")...

  3. Just because I'm odd and Aloha doesn't have one on the real Embracing Insanity (because it's Wordpress of course) I didn't add one, but if you go to your dashboard and then down to the reading list, if you click "add" then you can just add the blog straight from the URL and you get updates. It doesn't even have to be a Blogger blog.

  4. Thanks, I'll have to do that! I didn't know you could follow non-Blogger blogs with the blog reader... oh boy, before you know it I'll have an overload of blogs to read! LOL ;)

  5. ...You're a genius! I had no idea you could do that...

    Ha. First I wrote, "You're a genies." Oh dear.


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